So you see or know someone who you are attracted to. You may like their personality, looks, style, or all of the above. You would love to get to know them and then tell them how you feel. Getting to know them could be easy, as you can do that through talking to and hanging out with them. But telling them how you feel? Oh, that’s not so easy.
Some people can walk right up to someone and let them know how they feel. But others have a hard time, and for a number of reasons. They may be shy or they may be too afraid. Being shy and being afraid can work together, as you may be shy because you are afraid. Or afraid because you are shy. But you may be thinking, why? Why is it so difficult to say these three little words: “I like you”. Why can other people do it with ease, but others have so much trouble?
For starters, there is always that fear of rejection. Nobody likes to be rejected for anything. It hurts and it may make you wonder why you were rejected. It is also the fact that you are unsure of how you will be rejected. Some guys and girls will reject someone kindly and try not to hurt them, while others can just be downright rude about it. It would hurt to have the person you like be rude to you when you tell them you like them. It also comes from the fact of once you are rejected (if you are rejected), you may feel helpless, and that your dream of being with the person you like is over.
Besides rejection, you may feel humiliated. Unless it is someone they trust, not many people want the whole world to know about their crush. This can be how gossip or even teasing can start. Some people don’t even like to be playfully teased about the person they like. So they fear that someone will overhear that you like someone. Or maybe the person you like will tell someone who happens to tell others. Even worse, they may tell everyone themselves. In addition, just being rejected itself can be humiliated. To know that the person you like not only feels the same way, but will always know that you like them.
Of course, not everyone likes competition. Knowing that someone else likes the same person you do may cause you to avoid letting them know. Maybe you are afraid of how that other person will react. You may also be afraid of the person you like choosing someone over you, which can be discouraging. If they do choose the other person, you may also be afraid of how they will act in front of you.
You may also be shy. Some people are not as outgoing about what they want, and may have some trouble telling someone how they feel. There are many people who are shy (myself included, actually), and talking to someone may be difficult for them.
One other reason may be friendships falling apart. If it is a friend you like, you may not only be afraid they are going to reject you, but you are afraid that your friendship with them may begin to drift. You are afraid that they will feel awkward or even angry about you liking them and never treating you the same way again. You may also be afraid of going out with them, breaking up, and losing the friendship you once had with them.
These fears all come down to feeling rejected and hurt. Whether they reject you nicely or in a not-so-nice manner, it hurts to be rejected.
I am not in anyway trying to discourage you from telling the person you like how you feel. You never know, things may turn out great and you will find yourself in a wonderful relationship. But what I am doing is listing the reasons why it can be hard to tell someone you like them. To show you that while you may feel shy and afraid, you are certainly not alone in feeling this way.