You know what’s the rudest thing someone can do to you? No showing to a date, meeting, or any appointment. Now, lets be clear, there’s a difference between no showing and blowing someone off. Blowing someone off means someone has decided they have something better to do than whatever was originally planned. Blowing someone off can include no showing, but it need not. If someone blows you off, they still might e-mail, text, or call you to let you know. No showing, is not informing you that they’re not showing up, and you still believe everything is going as scheduled. It’s inconsiderate, rude, and flat out mean.
I was contacted by a head hunter a number of years ago that was trying to sell me on a startup he was recruiting for. He told me about the all the venture capitalists that were investing in it, the previous companies they invested in (it was an impressive list) and how I was assuredly going to be rich someday. I wasn’t particularly interested in the job, but I’ve never been one to turn down a networking opportunity. I said I’d be interested in meeting just to chat and learn about the company. I set up a time and place with the head hunter and a manager to meet for lunch.
The day of the lunch meeting, they never showed up. First of all, it was rude that they never e-mailed me or called me to let me know they couldn’t make it. Now, I’m not one to hold a grudge. Something might have happened. Maybe someone’s kid got sick and they had to go to the doctor. Perhaps there was a car accident. Maybe there was an emergency with a client or an investor and they had to deal with it. I wouldn’t have been that mad. All they would need to do is give me an apology and an explanation of what happened. After I finished lunch (by myself), I went home and e-mailed everyone to let them know I was at the restaurant as scheduled. They never e-mailed back, never called back, and never apologized. That is rude to the n-th degree.
By happen chance, this company had come to visit for a meeting at my place of work, but I wasn’t aware of it. I really wish I had an opportunity to meet them, because I would have let them know how I felt about them and how they do business.
The only other time I’ve been no showed was on a date. I drove over an hour and a half through traffic and even left work early to meet this person. I’ve been blown off for dates before. It happens, and I don’t mind that much. Most of the time it happens, I get a phone call or text letting me know. Sometimes it’s for pretty important things, an emergency with family, something came up at work, etc. Sometimes it’s for less serious things. The important thing is, they didn’t make me waste my time. I don’t know about other people, but it’s a really depressing feeling sitting in a restaurant all alone just waiting for your date, and your date never shows up.
Unlike the head hunter situation above, my date was kind enough to apologize to me afterwords. I cannot recall her reason for no showing, but it was lame. I appreciated the apology, but her inconsiderate nature was enough for me to decide there shouldn’t be another chance at a first date.