To be truly inspired and motivated to act, I have to have a deep understanding of why I’m doing things, because otherwise, I figure; what’s the point? Thinking like this isn’t always beneficial and it can be quite a hindrance when you know that there are things that need to get done.
Having a traumatic brain injury at the age of three, doesn’t always give you the best vantage point to live by. Things become slower and my understanding of the world around me is somewhat skewed by my brain that’s slow to react to the events and circumstances in life.
Understanding Traumatic Brain Injury
While it’s true that science has come a long way in understanding traumatic brain injury, I’m not one, to want to study up on the subject since I have to live with the effects of it every day of my fricking life.
I would like to think that I am somewhat guided by my intuition but whether or not that’s true, time will only tell.
I live a somewhat minimal existence with little drama. You don’t realize how much drama is involved in a divorce until you have the pleasure of going through it yourself.
Brain Injury Thought Processes
One of the disadvantages of having a brain-injury is that when you try to communicate your thoughts to someone, sometimes your thought processes go all over the place. I don’t know if that means that I have a problem staying focused that I haven’t admitted to yet, or what. All I know is that I have spent the majority of my life wanting to be like everybody else.
I’m starting to realize that I’m different from everybody else. Not so much physically, but mentally.
Physically, Mentally, And Emotionally
Physically, I look like everybody else on the planet. You would never know that I’m any different than anybody else by just looking at me. Mentally and emotionally, I’m different. Because of my traumatic brain injury, my thought processes are different, emotionally; I’m different in some way; I still haven’t figured out how.
I’m a sensitive person and I don’t know if that has anything to do with the brain injury or not.
I’m still trying to make sense of all this. I recently found a group that I could go to, and be around other people who have traumatic brain injuries. I find it to be refreshing to be around people that know exactly what I’m going through. For the longest time, I’ve had no one to talk to about these issues because I knew that no one would really understand.
Although this group only meets once a month, I find the weekly yoga activity to be relaxing and it also helps me to relieve stress.