In addition to the visible human suffering, and the human loss of lives that resulted from the explosion on the Deepwater horizon oil rig owned by british oil giant BP, animals who normally live in the gulf have had to find new ways to survive. Some endangered species of turtles, and other creatures, were transported to Walt Disney World in Orlando Florida to begin a lengthy rehabilitation process. However, does Disney have their heart in the right place or are they using the animals for slave labor? When the camera crews and media left the “Happiest Place on Earth” many of the animals were moved out of their cages and put to work. Ten of the surprising jobs that animals have been assigned to two are listed below:
1. Rescued endangered sea turtles were immediately put to work entertaining guests in a new show entitled “Dancing with Nemo and his Turtle friends.” The turtles have complained that they never worked this hard, even when foraging for food in the gulf. Though they admit that the tips are good.
2. Rescued sea gulls have been painted pink and been forced to pose for pictures as pink flamingos on display around the Little Mermaid’s Castle in Fantasyland. Half of them have one leg tied underneath them so that they even look like they are standing on one leg like real flamingos.
3. Chipmunks, who had mistook tar balls for walnuts, were rehabilitated and dressed up as miniature “Mickey Mouses” for use in a Disneyland parade called “Honey I Shrunk the Mickey!”. Many guests complained that their tails betrayed the fact that they are chipmunks, and so Disney regularly shaves the hair of their tails to make them look like mice.
4. Giraffes work the night shift by helping to replace burnt out light bulbs on Main Street. A task which normally took hours, due to the need to setup tall ladders, is now accomplished with high speed efficiency. For food, the giraffes are allowed to eat any popcorn on the ground that the chipmunks haven’t gotten.
5. Sea otters rescued from the oil spill were soon put to work as dwarfs in an onstage production of “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.” With the right amount of make up and wigs many guests find them to be eerily similar to the dwarfs from the famous live action film produced by MGM in the 1930’s.
6. Dolphins rescued from a gigantic underwater oil slick now wear hippopotamus masks and play the roles of hippos on the world famous Jungle Cruise. Occasionally you can see a dolphin fin poking up behind a hippo. Animal rights activists have complained, but apparently the dolphins like their new gig as it lets them bite people from time to time as part of the show.
7. Sea otters from the gulf spend their day by helping to pull a recreation of Mark Twain’s personal pleasure boat, “The Huck Fin Sail Ship” around the “Rivers of the Old West” attraction in the Magic Kingdom.
8. Sparrows hatched from oil soaked eggs have become park ambassadors, as their job is to guide lost children back to their parents. One day, as an apparent practical joke gone wrong, the sparrows lead a small child to “It’s a Small World” where he was forced to sing along with the dolls for half an hour while he waited for his parents to pick him up.
9. Alligators saved from oil soaked everglades in southern Florida help retrieve watches and cameras lost by butter-fingered tourists who drop them in the “Rivers of Time” boat ride by diving into the waters each night. Rumors are that they keep iPhones for themselves and sell them on the side to other employees.
10. Parrots, who eat a variety of sea food in the gulf region, were transported to the Magic Kingdom and glued to the ceiling of the Enchanged Tiki Room where they are made to sing to guests who eat lunch or dinner while watching the bird show. The hope was that the realistic birds would win over guests, but park managers forgot that real life bird poop isn’t too appeasing, and they had to cancel the new show.
For the top ten secret attempts by BP to stop the oil spill, click here.