Hollywood has a long history of turning books into movies, sometimes with wonderful results (Shutter Island) and sometimes turning them into disasters (Valentine). But since Hollywood isn’t going to stop, what books are just begging to be made into movies.
Heartsick by Chelsea Cain
Heartsick is an intelligent, brutal, and captivating thriller. It tells the story of Gretchen Lowell, better known as the Beauty Killer. Archie Sheridan is the detective who tracked her and put her in jail. Susan Ward is a young reporter assigned to follow Archie as he returns to the job from medical leave to investigate a new serial killer. As a condition of Gretchen’s plea deal, Archie must visit her in jail once a week to learn the location of another victim and to listen to the graphic details of how they died.
Gretchen needs to be played by an exceptionally beautiful actress. A woman who is mature, poised, and intelligent. A woman who men would kill for. I have always imagined Michelle Pfeiffer as Gretchen. She has the beauty and the talent, but there is also an iciness in her gaze that makes her appear cold. After seeing her performance as the villain in Stardust, I have no doubt she could play a vicious serial killer.
Gerard Butler would be great as Archie. He as an “everyman” quality to him that would make him believable as a detective. He could also portray the weariness and self-loathing that comes after being tortured for ten days by a woman you’ve fallen in love with.
Maggie Gyllenhaal should play Susan Ward. Like Susan, Maggie Gyllenhaal is quirky and there is fragility to her that makes her vulnerable. Plus, she could definitely carry off all of Susan’s ridiculous hair colors.
Christopher Nolan should be the man to bring Heartsick to the screen. I believe he could to turn what could very easily become torture porn into art. In his hands, Heartsick could become the new Silence of the Lambs.
Heart Shaped Box by Joe Hill
Heart Shaped Box is about an ageing rock star name Judas Coyne, who has made a hobby out of collecting the bizarre. The newest addition to his collection is a man’s suit in a heart shaped box that contains a man’s ghost. Judas at first thinks it’s a scam because ghosts don’t really exist, but he finds out to late that there is a ghost who wants him dead.
The role of Judas Coyne is the type of role that begs for Johnny Depp. It’s the kind of role he could disappear into. Johnny Depp would be completely believable as a man who collects things like a cookbook for cannibals, a snuff film, or a ghost. He can be cocky and arrogant, but still make you like him.
John Malkovich would be perfect to play Craddock, the ghost. Besides being a wonderful actor, he always makes a wonderful villain. He also has the ability to give his villainous characters an understanding motive. While his actions may be wrong, John Malkovich brings intelligence to his villains that make them oddly relatable and you need that with Craddock. Because while Craddock’s action are wrong, when you discover the reason why he’s haunting Judas you almost begin rooting for him.
Lindsay Lohan needs a comeback and this could be it. She would be believable as Judas’s girlfriend Georgia. Georgia is a young woman who is broken. She has no self-esteem and is more than willing to stay with a man who can’t be bothered to learn her real name. (Judas always calls his girlfriends by whatever state he picks them up in.)
Guilty Pleasures by Laurell K. Hamilton
Since vampires and werewolves are all the rage, it’s the perfect time for an Anita Blake movie. Anita Blake is the main character in Laurell K. Hamilton’s long running vampire hunter series. Anita Blake is a necromancer, meaning she can raise the dead. She is also government employed vampire hunter. Vampires have nicknamed her The Executioner. Of course, there is a vampire and a werewolf fighting over her affections.
Anita Blake is a small, tough, dark haired woman, a woman who can definitely take care of her self. Rose McGowan has the perfect look for Anita, dark hair and pale skin. Rose McGowan is also tough and a bit of a smart ass just like Anita.
Master of the City, Jean-Claude is a 200-year-old vampire who desperately wants Anita for his own. Jonathan Rhys Meyers is the only actor that came to mind as to who should play Jean-Claude. Jonathan Rhys Meyers has the perfect mix of masculinity and femininity to play Jean-Claude.Anita’s werewolf paramour is Richard, by day a schoolteacher, a werewolf by the full moon.
Bradley Cooper reminds me of Richard. He’s undeniably handsome. He’s masculine, but he can also be arrogant and cocky. Bradley Cooper also has great hair and if you’ve read the book you know it’s one of Richard’s most distinguishable features.