When you enter a room, what do people notice most; your smile or your eyes, that new haircut or your new outfit? Well, if you’re full figured, you probably think the first thing people notice is your size and that can sabotage your self esteem, making dating nearly impossible. How can you ensure your waistline isn’t the center of attention? It all starts with you!
It only takes 3 seconds for someone to form their first opinion of you! For those few seconds, you have to turn up your swagger! When you’re meeting someone new, there is no time to entertain those negative thoughts you have about yourself! Stand tall, smile and walk with confidence. Remember, you are not your waist size or the number on the scale. You are not the hurt you’ve experienced in the past and you are not the mistakes you’ve made in the past. You are confident, optimistic, smart and loveable! You are all that God has created you to be.
According to an article entitled, “What’s the Sexiest Part of a Woman’s Body” published in Glamour magazine in 2008 men believe the back of the neck, the eyes, soft hands, confidence and a smile are some of the sexiest things about a woman! None of these men mentioned a flat stomach or a size 0-6 frame. When it comes to clothing it is all about modestly accentuating the best parts of your body. Pick your clothing carefully. Clothing that fit your, “right now” body will work best. Don’t shy away from color during the summer months. Choose bright and vibrant colors that compliment your skin tone. I know it is easy to get frustrated when you go to the mall looking for a few new items but don’t! Full figured women are gaining representation, there are 19 designers showing during the Full Figured Fashion Week, from Monif C to Bella Donna and their designs are awesome! Yes, ladies we have options, don’t give up and please resist the temptation to throw on the latest flower print sack on the market!
Okay, we all know that body odor, yellow teeth and bad breath are all deal breakers on the first date or any date! Stay fresh, keep those dental visits and don’t forget to whiten those teeth! If you wear make- up, keep it clean, simple and fresh. You don’t want to hide your face behind lots of product. Invest in some quality skin care, keep your skin hydrated by drinking plenty of water and show your natural glow! Take care of your hair; Get those dead ends clipped and invest in a current style. Not every style is appropriate for your face. Maybe you have a round face and you want to add length to give a slimming effect. Maybe you need the opposite. Length could be overpowering your look. So, be sure to pick the hairstyle that works best for you. Also, try a dab of color. Highlights can give you a much needed update. If you’re not a manicure/pedicure girl, keep your hands and feet clean and soft. A coat of clear polish on clean, trimmed nails can go a long way!
You can have the best face and personality, if ignorance jumps out when you open your mouth….lonely you shall be! Think before you speak and don’t be afraid to walk up and make conversation. If your nerves get the best of you, try a friendly look and an inviting smile, you may not have to initiate the first encounter! Meeting new people should be fun and interesting! Just remember, the other party is meeting someone new as well, so listen, don’t dominate the conversation. Don’t make the conversation about your past, your weight or any other issues you are dealing with. Don’t turn the conversation into a debate. If you’ve decided that you do not agree with that person’s lifestyle or beliefs, politely excuse yourself from the conversation with a smile. Remember, talk about what you know, don’t pretend to have knowledge or experience in something if you don’t.
In our society, an overweight man can get a date faster than a plus-size woman, why? His attitude, he doesn’t allow his weight to cheat him of life. Never allow fear to keep you from happiness! Take pride in yourself and love yourself.
Life has started, get off the computer and join the party!