Can you remember a time when you were about 15 years old and were facing what seemed like an end-of-the-world crisis? To whom did you turn back then? Hopefully the relationship with your parents was healthy and you could bring up just about anything and freely discuss it. Or maybe not. Maybe you were one of those defiant teenagers.
Whatever the case with your parents, your children need to know that they can bring anything to you and feel like they will not be ridiculed, shamed, made to feel guilty, or criticized for their actions or mistakes. Yes, that is a hard thing to do as a parent, but if you don’t get it together in this one aspect of parenting, you’re at risk of losing the entire relationship with your children.
You are not alone in the battle against defiant teenagers
Just because parents need a little extra help from time to time is no sign that you are weak or a failure as a parent. Anyone who has ever raised a teenager will tell you that even under the best circumstances, raising teenager, especially defiant teenagers, is very challenging. Surround yourself with competent folks who can help out with support and advice.
Even if you are a single parent and have no support from another parent, there are other alternatives to help troubled teenagers. regardless of your parenting situation, the important thing here is to get as many supportive, encouraging, and affirming people around you and your teenager. And remember, it’s the nature of a teen to be defiant.
Parents of troubled teenagers need a little extra help
No one is a super parent. I have never seen or known any parent of teenagers who can do it all by themselves, it’s simply not possible. Everyone needs a little help. According to a Search Institute research study, less than 50% of middle- and high-school-aged children said they have at least three other caring adults to whom they can receive support, other than their parents.
That means more than half of these troubled teenagers do not have that same level of support. As a parent, it’s critical to make sure you know that your teens can turn to some other adults when necessary. Because families are so spread out these days, the old-fashioned nuclear family unit may not include grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other relatives. Those supporting roles need to be filled with people you know and trust.
Troubled teenagers and the parenting website
Technology has brought many things into the lives of parents these days. Overwhelming amounts of information are available out there on the Internet. Any parent can find out anything they may need to know when dealing with defiant teenagers, or where to go to get the best teen counselling.
Be careful when sifting through all the available parenting information that’s out there. Currently, there is no governing authority to determine or judge which information is good and useful, or which information is useless and not helpful. It’s the wild west out there on the information superhighway so be cautious, check with trusted friends and family, or listen to your own common sense.
Just remember, we were all once teenagers. Some of us were defiant teenagers, some were troubled teenagers, but all were teenagers. Parents who have more than one source of support are going to be better equipped to handle some of the crazy things headed your way as the parent of a teenager. As the Boy Scouts always say, be prepared.