The New York Times recently reported that fathers are starting to feel the pressure of balancing a home and work life even more so than women when it comes to finances, household duties, and taking care of children. A new study by Boston College concludes that fathers face a subtle bias in the workplace, that bosses sometimes feel that men don’t have pressures of taking care of children at home, so their workload is largely unaffected, even if they are a new father.
Men have reported more stress at home in dual-earner households than women, according to the study. Attributing to the trend in fatherly stress could be more and more dual-income families, in which both parents work, and there is less time to spend with children when parents are needed the most.
My Own Experience
When my wife and I first married, we both wanted careers, to make money and eventually start a family. Now that we have two children, we have found a nice balance of staying at home and working for both of us. My wife works largely in the home, and I work both at home and at a retail store as a manager.
Luckily, we have been able to put our knowledge and experience into working more and more at home, so we can be more accessible to our children and have more flexible schedules. Yes, it still has stress points and moments where time management and sleep deprivation set in, but, in general, our system has worked for over a year now.
We made this decision to be at home more often when our daughter became a sophomore in high school. As she entered a new phase in her life, we wanted to make sure she had everything she needed. Plus, our son also welcomed the extra Dad time so he could better tolerate the estrogen in the house.
We found ways to save money, as any family does, and, since we already owned many of the necessities of a modern family, all we had to do was make the bills work and we had a new system on the table. In general, everyone is happier and the home is healthier. There are definitely fewer fights, there is certainly less stress, and our kids’ grades have actually improved since I’ve been spending more time at home.
There are all kinds of statistics about people who work more and more out of the home, instead of in an office. If you can make this kind of thing feasible, I certainly recommend it. The new study released by Boston College has confirmed what my wife and I figured out a year ago: the extra money from working outside the home isn’t worth the stress or sacrificing happiness.
The New York Times and Boston College provided information for this article.