In the blink of an eye our lives flashed right before us. For a moment death could be smelt in the atmosphere. Split decisions are permanently etched into our brains. I can honestly say I faced death for a moment on May 5th of 2010.
Metal against metal. Glass shattered. Shards flew toward us. Time stood still. Slow motion erupted into our world. Fingers reached out for bodies, feeling for movement of some kind. In those split seconds of time I didn’t know whether or not we all had cheated death. Nothing seem to be in focus. Not for me not for anyone.
My hand grasped my son’s leg and our eyes met for a moment or two. But for a mother it seemed to be an eternity. The world had stopped around us.
Death, the shape shifter, morphed into a hideous monster reaching for our souls. Silent prayers escaped our gaping mouths of horror. Darkness seeped in, dragging me into its terrifying moment. Time stood still for us. Death came a knocking and we escaped with our lives. My body froze with fear. Brain and all failed me.
The car in front of me now on its top. How? My mind couldn’t wrap around the concept. I continued to sit in shock not comprehending what lay before me. My mind went blank. Everything was happening too fast. The man in the turned over vehicle climbed from the wreckage before any of the passengers from my car. Never in my life had I been in a wreck this bad before.
God and my angels had been watching over all of us, keeping us safe and protected. Without their conditional love and protection we would not be here today. The aftermath of the wreckage has given me an undying appreciation for life and those around me. I realized how special life is. I could have lost my son and myself.
Everything happens for a reason. We were meant to be there at that specific time and place. Why? Only logic is to shock us back into reality. Life is too short or too precious to take for granted. We dodged the bullet of death. How? By the grace of God and his angels we survived with no injuries.
I cannot recall many details. Others say I hit my head. Strange as it must be I cannot even recall the memory of that incident. It is a blessing in disguise. Bits and pieces of the accident cannot be recalled. From one driver to the next, it isn’t about whether or not you’re a bad driver. Its everyone around you need to be worried about.
The pieces of the puzzles to the accident is still a blurry to me. Nothing adds up. At least not in my mind. My passengers have a clear mind of what happened. But with me I don’t remember much of anything. Only bit of pieces still remain intact.
Auto accidents have a way of causing havoc on those involved. Injuries and shock are not the only aspects to deal with. An accident takes less than five minutes to occur. But the aftermath can last for years. Whether or not it’s the insurance companies, car repairs, medical injuries or even PTSD. As for me in my life altering accident, I am stuck dealing with the PTSD, car repairs and the insurance companies. The waiting game is one of the worst emotions to endure.
The PTSD symptoms has captured my world by the balls. I cannot face the brutal reality of what has happened. The slightest noise of a vehicle or glass shattering, the events of the accident comes reeling back to haunt me. It hasn’t been three weeks since the wreck occurred. As time goes on, I will begin to feel less stress and unsure of what to do next.
Things will get better in time. I need to have faith in myself and to believe I can survive this ordeal. The aftermath of the accident will soon fade but the memories of the incident will forever be planted into my mind. What little images and memories I do have, I will never be able to erase those.
Will I ever be able to recover from the effects of the accident? Not right away I won’t. But in time, things will eventually go back to normal. Whatever the word normal may be. Time will only tell.