Sometimes it is hard to tell a real friend from a phony, especially when a person is naturally kind and caring. They see the good in everyone while overlooking the bad, but just because someone is friendly does not mean they are a true friend. This world is made up of all types of people, some that give, and others that primarily take, and they all look the same. Consider the following ways to tell a real friend from a phony, and separate the users and the losers from the true friends and real supporters.
Keeping in Touch with a Real Friend
Everyone is too busy to call friends and even family from time to time, and for a variety of reasons. A real friend will take a moment to occasionally pick up the phone and chat, just for the sake of conversation. They will call to find out how real friends are doing while sharing their latest news. A Phony friend may do the same, but the calls of a phony are often laced with requests for favors as well as multiple complaints. Considering that a week has a total of 10,080 minutes, a 15-minute call once a week seems very brief. For a phony friend, even a ten minute call is often far too long – unless of course they want something.
Fun with a Real Friend
A real friend wants to spend time with buddies, even if they can only get together once or twice a month. They make a genuine effort to find the time. An activity with a real friend could include a meal, a movie, a day of shopping, or even a thirty-minute walk in a local park. Unless a real friend is many miles or hours away, it is important to do something on a regular basis. A phony friend is not likely to bother unless they initiate the request, and that request likely comes with an agenda that is not initially clear.
A phony friend will rarely want to get together at all – unless of course the phony stands to gain something. If visits with a buddy results in face-to-face requests for favors more often than not, and if the favors are rarely returned, this is the sign of a phony. Activity requests that are turned down time and time again by a phony will eventually send up a red flag, but not usually until many one-sided favors have been granted.
Signs of a Phony Friend
If often takes time to put the pieces of the puzzle together when trying to decide if someone is a phony and a user. A real friend is thoughtful and giving, and they give just as much and often more than they take. A phony friend does the bare minimum to keep the relationship going, and they receive much more than they give on a regular basis.
If a person has to ask if someone is a phony, or if they wonder if they are being used, chances are the friend is a phony in more ways than one. It is best to surround yourself with real friends that truly care beyond a reasonable doubt to avoid being taken advantage of, emotionally as well as monetarily. Life is far too short to spend a moment entertaining negativity or catering to selfish insensible people that are generously called a friend.