I shared a conversation with a very loving sister recently I want to share with you. Her name is Karen Bell. We talked about the relationship experiences of many men and women that do not work.
We talked about what men and women believe they want in their relationships. We talked about the biological imperatives, genetic spiritual dispositions, social programming, and the like.
The more we talked, the more I was fascinated listening. Karen talked about a phenomenon I understood. I had just never heard it this way. She talked about the difference between Hot Fudge Love and Broccoli Love. I was intrigued.
She described the human attraction to the chocolate experience of hot fudge. She spoke of how men and women like hot fudge, often want hot fudge, and more often than not indulge their desire to experience hot fudge.
She likened hot fudge to what we see with our eyes we believe we want. She talked about men and women having predispositions to what they believe to be attractive with limited thought of the character or spiritual emotional maturity of the attractive. Men and women see someone they have to have (a brick house or a fine brother), likening them to hot fudge, only to discover, no one lives by hot fudge alone. Something consistently healthy in our diet is going to be necessary to sustain us and keep us going.
My mouth, my eyes and my ears are open. I love it when my mind is consciously on fire alive in the moment of experience.
These moments are not for the spiritually immature. They are for those whose experiences have prompted them to seek a higher level approach, or a more mature path to love and relationship.
Having identified the human fantasy life as the desire for a continual hot fudge experience that cannot yield healthy relationships, Karen proceeded to talk about broccoli love. She described broccoli as something many do not like the thought of. It is a vegetable after all. It is not sweet and sexy like hot fudge, but it is good for you. You can depend upon it. Too much of it is not self destructive. It does not pretend to be something it is not. It is what it is. It is not pretty in a mini, or in leather, but it is faithful.
The question for the many who would pursue love and relationship or be pursued by love and relationship is, hot fudge love or broccoli love? Hot fudge love is FINNNUUHHH! It is fun. You can fantasize about it. It is sweet and sexy but lacks the capacity for commitment. It is what it is. It looks good, tastes good, feels good, and very often unable to hang in the long run. Broccoli love on the other hand is neither sweet nor sexy. It is firm. It will stick with you. It is capable of commitment.
We agreed that at our level of spiritual maturity, we still like things that excite us, that look good, smell good, and feel good; but there are things that are more important. We know (because experience has taught us) that mature, spiritual, and civilized adults can not live on hot fudge love alone and be relationally healthy.
If you have been blessed by this word, share it with someone you know that struggles with the question; hot fudge love or broccoli love? Keep Up The Love!