Since the oil rig explosion eight weeks ago, BP, the British based global energy company, has become a household name; unfortunately for all the wrong reasons. I am confident that ten years from now, their company will be the answer to the cash cab video challenge question “What company was responsible for causing a catastrophic oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico, and is still trying to get it stopped?” BP Oil? That is correct! I understand that you are sorry, you have tried to step up, and will end up shelling out some big bucks before this is over! (Cleanup costs $22million per day; BP earns 45million per day)
Nevertheless, BP…, it’s time! You have tried to stop this leak with your various scientific methods and it’s now the eighth week of the spill! America has tried to be patient, but this is getting ridiculous! I mean… for eight weeks, thousands upon thousands of barrels of oil have been gushing into the Gulf of Mexico and they continue to flow! Seriously! I am dumb-founded by this fact. It’s like having the family at the breakfast table ready to dive into a huge stack of pancakes… Your youngsters, Amelia and Hunter, simultaneously reach for the 2-gallon jumbo jug of maple syrup and clumsily tip it over!
Noooooo! The thick amber liquid oozes from the jug onto the table. Your startled son looks up at you with surprise on his face!
“Sorry!” he cries, watching the spill grow.
You all stop and stare as syrup spreads on the table and then slides over the edge to the floor. Imagine how bizarre that scene would be if the family began discussing possible ways to get the spill stopped? Meanwhile… the jug continues pouring out its contents as you brainstorm what to do… I mean… it makes me crazy just thinking about it… and that’s why I think it is time… for the American people to act! We have our own source of experts that daily face dilemmas this tough. I present to you, in no particular order, five groups that could help solve BP’s mess!
Think about it… This group of people are passionate about their cause, united by their interests, and have probably seen at least 34 episodes of Star Trek where Spock and Kirk solved an oil spill just like this. If you have ever had the chance to attend a convention, listen to Trekkie’s discuss theories, scenarios, spacecrafts, futuristic weaponry and technology, you know what I mean!
2.The L.A. Graffiti Crews
No, I am not promoting this group or attempting to glorify them. But any group that can go to a public freeway overpass, create a mural the size of Rhode Island, in an impossible-to-reach location and do it without being seen or caught… is amazing! Send a few of their Homies and Boyz… they might have a chance… and an extra bonus to their nomination is that they won’t be around here.
3. Raider Nation
This group of football fans hasn’t had much to cheer about for decades, but they are die-hard, risky, and frighteningly resilient. I went to a Raider-Seahawk game at the L.A. Coliseum once, watching five brawls break out…during the National Anthem! I remember telling my young sons not to make a peep if our team scored a touchdown! Most of these fans are blue-collar union workers that probably have a lot more to offer than they are given credit for. As incentive, promise the return of the Raider Team and a new L.A. stadium, and step back!
4. The Motion Picture Industry
After taking a tour of Universal Studios and watching the incredible special effects that that are created or designed by the studios makes me believe that their creativity and confidence would enable them to succeed. Write it out as a script, give them a deadline and BP’s checkbook and we might all be surprised. They also have access to Batman, Spider-man, the Hulk, Chuck Norris and the Housewives of Orange County!
The American Civil Liberties Union has been responsible for stopping so many other things that were running smoothly and freely. (prayer, religious freedom, the criminal justice system, etc.) If they can bring these God given rights to a halt,they might be able to stop an oil leak. Of course, on second thought, the ACLU may become sympathetic to the oil’s attempt to flow freely, and consequently, bring a lawsuit claiming cruelty to an oil spill.
Certainly a list of honorable mentions come to my mind…..feel free to add your own!
The Hells Angels, Benny Hinn, David Blane, Chris Angel, MacGyver….
and as you think up your own list, just picture that family sitting around the table, still trying to come up with a plan that just might work!