My two favorite genres of books are science fiction and fantasy. Yes, I will admit, I’m a nerd to the core. Yes, I can do the V-finger Vulcan salute, my wife hates it when I utter a Klingon phrase, and I can even nitpick the Lord of the Rings Trilogy with the best of them (no elves at Helm’s Deep amongst others). I would love to see some of my favorite books turned into movies and who should be directing and starring in them. Here’s my list and their vital stats.
Eyes of the Dragon by Stephen King
Surprisingly, Eyes of the Dragonhasn’t been made into a movie yet. This semi-mild child’s tale is standard fantasy fare of a banished prince who reclaims his throne. But the name Stephen King would still make a relevant film today with all of the other fantasy series coming out with great movies. Set in the same world as his Dark Tower series, this book even has the same villain. King’s movie could be a PG-ish version that is quirkified for children.
Tim Burton would have to direct. King and Burton both share a somewhat darker visage of tales for children. The book is told from the perspective of a storyteller, who could be played by Stephen King in the movie. No, please no Johnny Depp. Flagg, the evil magician who advises King Roland, should be played by either of the Fiennes brothers Joseph or Ralph. I’m not trying to typecast Ralph Fiennes as a bad guy (Voldemort in Harry Potter) but I can think of no one better to play Flagg.
King Roland has two teenage boys so he can’t be too old. Jude Law would be perfect. Princes Peter and Thomas should also be British. How about a re-teaming up of Daniel Radcliffe as Peter and then Tom Felton as Thomas to reunite Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy from the Potter movies? I would love to see Eyes of the Dragon made into a mostly British cast for this medieval tale of fantasy and sorcery.
Click Clack Moo Cows That Type by Doreen Cronin and Betsy Lewin
Click Clack Moo was one of my son’s favorite books when he was learning how to read. It’s been made into a series of books about a duck on a farm that gets into all kinds of trouble like ordering pizza for the farm animals and even running for office. They’ve already made a musical for Click Clack Moo, so bring on the movie!
This movie would be all about talking farm animals and their adventures. There is a farmer but I don’t know if should have a huge part as compared to the animals. A good director would be John Lasseter of Pixar. Even if you make this into an animated movie then Pixar will find a way to make it funny for kids and adults.
If a live action version is made I would love to see Sam Elliott as the farmer. He’s old enough and crusty enough to play a farmer who won’t put up with any antics on the farm. Duck can be voiced by none other than Jim Carrey. Some of the other farm animals such as a cow can be voiced by Doris Roberts and Patrician Heaton of Everybody Loves Raymond fame.
Good Omens by Terry Pratchett
One of the comic geniuses of our time, Terry Pratchett’s dark and wildly funny Good Omens is a perfect movie for 2012 with all of the gloom and doom stuff associated with that year. The book follows a tug of war between heaven and hell, good angels and bad, over a coming end of the world. The problem is both the angel and demon don’t want the world to end and go against the Divine Plan.
Chris Columbus makes a good director because of his previous associations of dark movies with comic relief including Gremlins. Playing the good and evil minions of Fate in this perfectly British tale should be none other than Helena Bonham Carter and Hugh Grant. Which role they get really doesn’t matter as long as they both get the leads. A cameo of Agnes Nutter should go to Judi Dench or Emma Thompson making her silly prophecy of doomsday and the end of times.