And now, ladies and gentlemen, let’s meet our newest American Idol… Judges. Okay, so the announcement hasn’t been made yet. Conveniently, the longer the identity of the next panel of judges is delayed, the more time audiences will have to build up expectations.
There will be two empty spots to fill in the panel of judges with Ellen Degeneres apparently exiting of her own volition after just a single-season in the Idol judge role, along with Kara Dioguardi who just never really caught on with fans. Oh, and of course stereotypical haughty Brit critic Simon Cowell was the first to announce his exit. But the show’s creators wisely want to return to the old three judge formula, according to reports.
Supposedly the front-runners to fill those slots are Aerosmith’s elastic-mouthed Steven Tyler and perennial fan favorite and hot mama Jennifer Lopez (or is it Jennifer Anthony?; well, to her friends I guess she’s just Jenny from the block, or J-Lo, or the former half of Bennifer). Neither J-Lo or Tyler seem to be at the apex of their careers, so the chance to sit in judge’s row on the Fox network’s star attraction has got to be considered a comeback of sorts.
Frankly, I wasn’t at all surprised to hear of Ellen’s ‘decision’ to leave American Idol, nor would I be shocked if she was kind of urged into that choice. She really never brought anything to the show, to borrow a phrase typically aimed at the singing contestants. She lacked that oomph, as the judges are wont to say. You could tell from the start that she was uncomfortable giving criticism, and her lack of music industry experience showed in her less than spot-on criticisms and generic gushy remarks.
I love Ellen Degeneres but she was spreading herself too thin. Rosie O’Donnell would have been a far better choice because she had already shed her nicey-nice persona and would have been willing to go for the jugular.
I don’t imagine Kara will be missed by many. Her songs are the treacle-filled messes that I despise American Idol for producing – like those cringe-inducing songs the season’s final two are forced to sing – the song that the poor winner is saddled with as their debut release.
I also have a theory that Simon Cowell’s departure from American Idol is not coincidentally timed with the BP oil spill and the resultant stain on anything Brit right now. Ever since that Brit twit BP head Tony Hayward came into our living rooms with his inane and condescending remarks, I haven’t had the patience for any of these haughtier than thou British judges – yes, I’m looking at you Simon Cowell and Piers Morgan. Your schtick is getting old!
