Yet another news story has enraptured me to the point that I am passionate about it’s victims. I came across the story of little 2 year-old Vanessa Doss, who was in the process of being legally adopted by single mom Stacey Doss at birth. Stacey Doss is the only mother that little Vanessa has ever known.
Vanessa’s biological father, Benjamin Mills Jr., has lost custody of his four other children. He has served time in prison for domestic violence. He has been convicted of domestic violence multiple times. He has a child endangerment charge on his record. He has not raised this little girl and she does not know him. He has also not been paying child support faithfully to his other children. And yet, our American court system is leaning in his favor. Vanessa Doss has depleted her savings to fight for the safety and well-being of her daughter, Vanessa Doss.
Vanessa’s biological mother told the adoption agency and Ms. Doss that she didn’t know who the father was. I suspect she was doing this to protect Vanessa from harm. After all, Mr. Mills served eight months in prison for abusing her.. Vanessa’s biological mother wanted the best for her baby. And yet, that dream is on the verge of crumbling.
When I first heard about this case, I wasn’t sure. If Benjamin Mills Jr. did not have the history that he has, I might understand why he should at least have visitation rights with this little girl. However, after learning the facts in the case, I don’t believe that Vanessa Doss should be removed from the only mother she has ever known.
Below is an open letter to Benjamin Mills Jr, regarding the fate of Vanessa Doss. For more details on this case, please see the sources listed at the end of the article. There is also a Facebook group, “Operation Vanessa” here to join to support Stacey Doss in her battle.
Dear Mr. Mills,
I’ve never met you, but I do want to say that my heart goes out to you. It sounds like you have had a difficult life, have made serious mistakes, and are trying to make things better.
However, respectfully and kindly, Mr. Mills, I urge you to stop fighting for custody of little Vanessa Doss.
My main reason is this: If Vanessa is taken away from Ms. Doss it will harm her psychologically and emotionally. It will have long last effects on her overall health. Vanessa has bonded with Stacey, and she is the only mother she has ever known. Grieving the loss of her mother will lead to behavioral issues, disruptions in sleep, difficulty bonding with others, and more. Please, for the sake of Vanessa’s health, I ask that you stop fighting for custody of this precious little girl.
Mr. Mills, it concerns me that you have a history of domestic violence and child endangerment. While I do believe it is possible for people to change, is it worth risking Vanessa’s overall health to meet your desires? It also concerns me that you have not been paying child support for your other children. How can you financially provide for Vanessa, if you cannot for your others?
On behalf of little Vanessa, please be a hero. Please stop the court fight. You will be setting a positive example for your other four children. Vanessa will be raised in a loving and nurturing home. Give Vanessa the greatest belated birthday gift: the security and love of the only mother she’s ever known.