If you are trying like hell to be the kind of woman he wants, he’s NOT the guy YOU want.
I’ve been with women before that two months into the relationship, they flip out over something that I’ve been doing for a DECADE. For two months, they said NOTHING about the fact that I doodle by playing something on my acoustic guitar (even if it’s just a fifteen second riff) at random times during the day regardless of what I’m in the middle of doing. Had she said something the second or third time I did it, perhaps I would have made an effort to change my behavior and we wouldn’t have gotten to her boiling over point. My point:? Be yourself. If you have to hide your Usher and your Justin Timberlake CD’s when he comes over or pretend to love his “Vote For Pedro” shirt, you are trying to hard. Go ahead and tell him that his shirt is lame if you think so. Proudly display your entire CD collection. He may prefer that you are more into Rob Zombie and Rush but those things won’t likely be a deal breaker and if they are, don’t let the door him him in the ass on his way out.
Don’t fool yourself if there’s no spark.
So this guy is so sweet. He keeps calling you but you’re just not really “into” him. He’d make a good friend but not a good boyfriend. There’s just no spark between the two of you. Don’t give him chance after chance to see if things grow. By letting him date you over and over again when you can’t see yourself actually being with this guy, you’re letting him think that there is some serious potential of something developing. He’ll be thinking, “Well she MUST like me, she keeps going out with me”. If there’s no spark after two or three dates, put him out of his misery and let him go.
You’re the prize. He’s NOT.
Traditionally, the man is the pursuer. He is the one chasing you. He is likely the one who asked you out and that’s why you’re dating. Don’t make it too easy for him. If he wants you, he will be willing to work for it. Make him work for it.
Stick to your high standards.
You slept with him and he didn’t call you. If that’s a no no in your book (as it is with most women) let him know that. If you’re seriously hurt by him doing that or something else. Turn your back and walk away. I knew a woman who was dating a man who she saw as perfect. He was good looking, he was smart, he was a gentleman, financially secure and very sweet and caring to her. BUT.. he just happened to be racist. She was very disappointed but she let him go because of that. He was perfect in her eyes in every other area but she just couldn’t and refused to stomach that fact that he was a racist. Don’t settle!
If he digs you, you are always right. If he doesn’t dig you, you are always wrong.
You should be able to recognize this early on. If he is always criticizing you, let him go. He should have no problem about the fact that you sing along loudly the radio in the car (and you can’t sing) If he really digs you, the fact that you are tone deaf and don’t know it will not bother him.
I bet some of those rules, you never really thought about. Well consider yourself a bit wiser after reading this. Go ahead and try them out. There is nothing wrong with demanding to be swept off your feet. After all, it’s the man’s responsibility to do just that. Don’t let him in without putting forth his maximum effort. Good luck.