The average single person wants (for the most part); to find “Mr. or Mrs. Right.” Friends arrange dates, blind dates are agreed upon, and now thanks to the internet you can use dating sites. When you do get the special day arranged you head out feeling very optimistic. But men and women alike don’t always get the opportunity to have a second date.
It isn’t always chemistry or things in common that can be the cause of this; it is usually what is “done or said” on the date. Here are 5 common mistakes that people make on a first date.
1. Too much information-When a couple goes out for the first time their main objective is usually to get to know the person; such as what they like or don’t like. This is pretty common because it’s important to see if they are a match. But some people take this to the extreme. There are certain things that should never be talked about on a first date. Talking about an ex-boy/girlfriend is never good because it has nothing to do with the person that is sitting across from you. The reason for your break-up can truly put a damper on things and totally make the other person feel uncomfortable. Rule of thumb; don’t talk about them and don’t ask about them.
2. Manners-Our parents taught us manners; at least hopefully they did. Don’t chew with your mouth open, be polite, take turns, and be respectful. But some people don’t exercise these simple rules. They don’t try to make a good first impression. A lot of people say “well I want her/him to like me for me”; “I don’t want to be fake.” But the reality is you should still carry yourself in a way that reflects what your parents taught you.
3. Listening and waiting until it’s your turn to talk-This is usually behavior that is played out in an already developed relationship. But some people start out doing this even before they get to that stage. Now this isn’t sexist but when I talked to women they said that their spouses don’t often listen to them; whether it is in the middle of an argument or a simple conversation. Some people will admit that when their significant other is talking they aren’t always listening. Instead they are thinking about what “they” will say next. Truly listening to another person is the only way you’ll get to know them. In addition to this manipulating or taking complete control of the conversation is a big no no. Allowing the other person to “get their 2 cents in” is not only polite but it is respectful.
4. Dishonesty-If we’re honest with ourselves we’ll admit that at some point in our lives we told a lie. Whether it was stretching the truth or a flat out whopper we are still guilty. Being honest with another person is absolutely essential when getting to know one another. Not only are you being “real” with a person you’re also letting them know that you care enough to be truthful. In addition, when you tell one lie it leads to another, then another, and then another. Before you know it you can’t even remember the real truth.
5. Embellishments-This one goes hand in hand with lying. Sometimes we want to make ourselves more interesting, more important, and even more attractive when it comes to who we are. I’m not talking about physical appearance, I’m talking about character. Telling your date that you are wealthy, have a better job than you actually do, or have a high status in the community will get you nowhere. Embellishing doesn’t allow the other person to get to know the real you. If you do this they’ll be dating someone that isn’t who they think they are. Besides the truth will always reveal itself.
So there you go, 5 dating mistakes which can lead to disaster. When you go on your next date keep these 5 things in mind. Who knows it may lead to a second!