In the world of dating there are a lot of first dates, and way too many second dates. Why do we keep setting up these dates? So what if he called you, and you’ve never had a guy call you back. So what if getting a call from this “guy” excited you, you need to think first. These are ten great reasons why you don’t need to call him back.
The first and foremost reason for not calling him back is because you weren’t into him. Just because you went on a date does not mean it’s a rule to go on a second one. Nobody is this desperate or in need of this many problems. If you weren’t interested, loose the number.
The second and maybe even more important than the first is his tendency to show a bunch of red flags. These red flags are flags that will tell you that he is going to be abusive or worse, you’re going to be getting into a deadly relationship. These flags start off as controlling (in any way), telling you what you can and can’t think, monopolizes everything including the ordering and the conversation. He’s concerned with your bathroom exit to call you friends, and immediately wants to know what you did and if you called anyone. This is a big “run away and loose the number” all over it.
If a guy says anything negative about your body.If this guy makes any remark that resembles cow, pig, fat, chubby, or any synonymy that might mean those things. You need to not even think about a call let alone a second date. If he is already talking about your weight, you’re into a whole slew of forced weight concerns.
When you’re sitting there on your date, does he look at other women? An occasional glance is one thing, but looking at every passing skirt is concerning. He might still be on the market, and you as he is, are merely the item he is deciding to go into a committed contract with. He should have enough respect to give you his attention in this small fragment of time that you are with him. If he can’t even give you his full attention on this date, what are the rest of them going to be like?
The fifth action that says delete his voice mail is if he mentions or comments about women as being pieces of meat or objectifying them. If he says something like he’s looking for the next woman who wants to be his, or his comments state that he sees women as second class huge sirens should go off in your head. That voice mail should merely be a reflex, not something you have to think about.
When a first date magnifies your differences, this is one of the cases that opposites are not that great for attracting. If you like long walks, and he likes his video games. If he enjoys being outside and rugged all the time, and you idea of rugged is a month with out a mani/pedi. If he loves his steak, and you’re a vegan. The list can go on and on, there are a lot of opposites that don’t work.
Disabilities, especially severe disabilities and mental disabilities are hard to deal with for a very long time. If you come across someone who truly suffers from OCD, then you better be ok with them looking the door 17 times, or constantly cleaning themselves. And if you’re not ready for children, you’re definitely not ready for someone with a sever disability such as blindness or being paralyzed. If you truly aren’t ready for this step, then you should not call him back.
Children are cute, lovable, funny, and the joy of their parent’s life. Remember, for every kid int he picture there is another woman that will always be in your life, and the child will always compare you two. Are you ready for children? Are you looking for a world of children? A world of middle of the night nightmares, parks, loud restaurant visits, and flighty baby sitters? If you’re not ready for this, or can’t handle any part of this, then it isn’t fair for the child or the dad to call him back and give him false hope.
The ninth reason seems harsh on the surface, but is very true. There are many men out there that have been forced to believe they are straight. They really want to believe it, but their heart isn’t in it nor is their genes. When you first meet someone you know in your gut that that person is gay or not. It’s not a stereotype or a bash, gay men are able to be seen as gay very easily. If you know he is gay, don’t return his call. Allow him to find himself, and maybe later you guys can go to clubs together.
Lastly, do not call back any guy who wants to have sex, says I love you, or generally makes you feel creepy on the first date. These people are looking for lust and sex, they are not looking for a relationship. These men are not stable and do not understand what relationships are. You do not want be mixed up with a person who is not in love with you, but in love with being in love. There are also very lonely people out there who just can’t handle being alone. These people will jump into anything at the speed of light, and then hate the whole thing. If you run into this speedy people, delete the call.